Post by cashflowx on Aug 6, 2007 22:53:37 GMT -5
NWA Anarchy
Episode 75
August 6, 2007
Welcome to another edition of the NWA Anarchy TV Report, professional wrestling’s only television review without MERITT~! I’m moving, so this week’s report doesn’t feature any commentary.
WRESTLING: (n.) \’res-ling\ A sport of contest in which two individuals face off in unarmed combat.
ANARCHY: (n.) \an-ar-key\ (1) A state of lawlessness due to absence of authority. (2) A complete lack of order.
What happens when you mix the two together? NWA-Anarchy!
- Last week on Anarchy, Slim J evened up his best of series with Patrick Bentley, Jeff G Bailey reappeared after being locked up in Eddie Rich’s basement for 28 days and Phil Shatter powerbombed Iceberg to Hades.
- John is not only the Body, but he is ecstatic because Iceberg did the job and Bailey returned. This week, it’s Slim J vs. Patrick Bentley III and Truitt Fields battles Jeremy Vain for the NWA Anarchy TV Title. Also, “the Insult Technician” Chad Parham will be doing battle with “Mr. Mid-Atlantic” Damien Wayne in the opening round of the NWA World Heavyweight Title Tournament.
1. Jeremy Vain retained the NWA Anarchy TV Title after wrestling Truitt Fields to a draw.
All Truitt has to say is cheer and the crowd will respond, how loud? Truitt gets right down to business by demonstrating his physical prowess. Vain is so mesmerized by Truitt’s physique that he decides to initiate a game of cat and mouse. Early on, Truitt was able to keep Vain in check with clotheslines and a gorilla press slam. Vain says, “I ain’t taking any more of this bull nuts” and resorts to the ever heelish Mo Howard Eyelock. Vain uses a nice wheelbarrow German to score a near fall. The crowd starts up a thunderous “Truitt” chant and he responds by not only blocking a suplex, but sneaking in one of his own. Vain didn’t take too kindly and nailed Truitt in the mush with a mafia kick. Truitt escapes the dreaded chinlock and sends Vain scurrying for cover with a huge powerslam for a 2½ count. Truitt sneaks in several more near falls before Vain heads back to Dodge. Truitt is forced to bring Vain in the hard way and gets a 2¾ count after a posting on a catapult. Again, Truitt sets up for another pinning predicament, but not before Vain can moon the crowd. Vain leaps down to the arena floor as the bell rings to signal that the time limit has expired. Truitt chases Vain to the back. Thankfully, Vain didn’t take over seventy nine counts to retain the title, but his Lord Steven Regal retreating is awesome.
RATING: *½
2. Derrick Driver & Steven Walters defeated Sex & Money (Andrew Pendleton III & “Mr. Obsession” Caleb Konley).
John Johnson loathes sportsmanship, so do I. I personally believe that’s its perfectly fine to practice the ultimate form of birth control, to gouge visual organs, and to be a human ammunition depot. Unfortunately, this match lacked any weapons of mass destruction. That’s okay, both teams worked a good match and ended when Driver caught Pendleton with a Sunset flip on a blind tag. Later on the show, it would be revealed why these teams shook hands.
- The Anger Alliance appears on the WrestleVision Tron 7800. Adam Roberts instructs Kyle Matthews & Brandon Phoenix to study all groups of 4 throughout wrestling history. And then out of nowhere, Matthews struts not so like Ric Flair and goes WHOO! At this point, this might be the most awesome promo ever. Brody Ray Chase brags about racking in mad Lucci while allegedly talking on the phone to Sal Rinauro. He jabbers about Todd Sexton, who mysteriously appears in the ring. Well, a referee heads to the back to let the rudos know that one Todd Sexton is calling them out. Sexton calls out the Anger Alliance because Sal has no BALLS OF STEAL like the Human Tornado. They answer Sexton’s challenge promptly by beating the living poop out of him. Everyone took turns stiffing the nuts out of Sexton. It was a beatdown of epic proportions. Brody Ray gave him the stunner, Phoenix delivered his patented STO, Roberts with the spinning cutter and Matthews with the Clothesline from Butcher’s Hollow. Sexton knew that he was f**ked and picked the wrong night to pick on a group of 4 that lived up to its name. Sexton sold it like a million bucks. Driver, Walters, Pendleton and Konley ran out to make the save. Sexton won’t be optically challenged after taking that licking. By the way, John Johnson, I heard Richard Morton and Rick Steiner are available for the Varsity Club.
- Seth Delay interrupts Patrick Bentley backstage. Delay basically tells him that not only is Bentley out of Slim J’s league, but he can’t even hang with him. Bentley wants to strangle Delay, but he has a long fuse and shrugs it off. Delay will still be Bentley’s friend even after the love of his life snatches all of worldly possessions.
3. Slim J squashed Patrick Bentley to take a 2 – 1 lead in the best of series.
This match certainly didn’t boost Bentley’s confidence. In fact, Slim J outright humiliated the youngster by living up to every thing that Survivor’s theme says: outwit, outsmart and outlast. Slim provided a professional wrestling and mixed martial arts clinic by demonstrating his knowledge of triangle chokes, armbars, high flying aerodynamics, DDTs and fisherman floatovers, and arm scissors. Slim finally gets tired of Bentley and easily destroys him with the Roach clip to go up in their series 2 – 1. Slim just shakes his head at Bentley when grabs the mike. He called Bentley’s effort heartless and pathetic. Bentley tries to interject himself, but Slim laughs in his face and promises to whip his ass again, BUSTER~! Just like Lennox Lewis gave Oliver McCall back in 1998, all according to the gospel of John Johnson.
- No edition of Anarchy is complete with a confrontation between the NWA Elite and the Devil’s Rejects. Attorney/agent Jeff G Bailey was accompanied by Abomination, Jeff Lewis with his stogie and the newest edition, Phil Shatter. Bailey continued to brag about the chaos and destruction the Rejects met every time they face-off with the Rejects. Last week, “the Universal Soldier” Phil Shatter powerbombed Iceberg straight to Hades and became the first to ever pin him in Anarchy history. Iceberg was no longer a serial killer in the eyes of Bailey. He bragged about how Shatter survived IED’s, mortars and dead bodies riddled on the ground, yet he still managed to slay his enemies. And oh then there is the “Human Holocaust” Abomination, the man who single-handedly murdered Tank’s career. Last, but not least, Lewis had taken care of Tempers. Dan Wilson would be wise to never show face his again. This prompted Dan Wilson to rally his troops against the NWA Elite. Wilson accuses Bailey of working for FOX News with all the spin doctoring he’s putting on the story. He calls Shatter a “GI Jerkoff” and never defeated Iceberg or Tempers. Wilson had a fever and it wasn’t the flavor of a Pringle, it was for the blood of his own Rejects. Wilson was prepared to launch a full scale attack, but NWA Owner Jerry Palmer headed out to prevent World War III from occurring. Palmer threatens this feud better end at the Georgia Mountain Center in Gainesville, GA on the 23rd, when they will battle inside a 14 foot high steel cage in War Games. Wilson wants sacrificial lambs for the slaughter and noted the Elite are a man short. Bailey reminded that the Elite has unlimited resources and Rainman would fill in. Wilson screams as the Cornelia’s finest heads out to stop the carnage. Bailey calls Wilson a coward for calling the Po Po. As both factions prepare to battle, the cop that looked like he won the doughnut eating competition orders them to the back.
- NOTES: Chad Parham and Seth Delay had to pull out of the August 25 NWA Southern Pro show. However, Bryan Danielson is still set to wrestle Sean Denny on September 29 in Ahoskie, NC.
- DOWNLOAD: www.thesuperstation.net/nwaanarchy.html.
Episode 75
August 6, 2007
Welcome to another edition of the NWA Anarchy TV Report, professional wrestling’s only television review without MERITT~! I’m moving, so this week’s report doesn’t feature any commentary.
WRESTLING: (n.) \’res-ling\ A sport of contest in which two individuals face off in unarmed combat.
ANARCHY: (n.) \an-ar-key\ (1) A state of lawlessness due to absence of authority. (2) A complete lack of order.
What happens when you mix the two together? NWA-Anarchy!
- Last week on Anarchy, Slim J evened up his best of series with Patrick Bentley, Jeff G Bailey reappeared after being locked up in Eddie Rich’s basement for 28 days and Phil Shatter powerbombed Iceberg to Hades.
- John is not only the Body, but he is ecstatic because Iceberg did the job and Bailey returned. This week, it’s Slim J vs. Patrick Bentley III and Truitt Fields battles Jeremy Vain for the NWA Anarchy TV Title. Also, “the Insult Technician” Chad Parham will be doing battle with “Mr. Mid-Atlantic” Damien Wayne in the opening round of the NWA World Heavyweight Title Tournament.
1. Jeremy Vain retained the NWA Anarchy TV Title after wrestling Truitt Fields to a draw.
All Truitt has to say is cheer and the crowd will respond, how loud? Truitt gets right down to business by demonstrating his physical prowess. Vain is so mesmerized by Truitt’s physique that he decides to initiate a game of cat and mouse. Early on, Truitt was able to keep Vain in check with clotheslines and a gorilla press slam. Vain says, “I ain’t taking any more of this bull nuts” and resorts to the ever heelish Mo Howard Eyelock. Vain uses a nice wheelbarrow German to score a near fall. The crowd starts up a thunderous “Truitt” chant and he responds by not only blocking a suplex, but sneaking in one of his own. Vain didn’t take too kindly and nailed Truitt in the mush with a mafia kick. Truitt escapes the dreaded chinlock and sends Vain scurrying for cover with a huge powerslam for a 2½ count. Truitt sneaks in several more near falls before Vain heads back to Dodge. Truitt is forced to bring Vain in the hard way and gets a 2¾ count after a posting on a catapult. Again, Truitt sets up for another pinning predicament, but not before Vain can moon the crowd. Vain leaps down to the arena floor as the bell rings to signal that the time limit has expired. Truitt chases Vain to the back. Thankfully, Vain didn’t take over seventy nine counts to retain the title, but his Lord Steven Regal retreating is awesome.
RATING: *½
2. Derrick Driver & Steven Walters defeated Sex & Money (Andrew Pendleton III & “Mr. Obsession” Caleb Konley).
John Johnson loathes sportsmanship, so do I. I personally believe that’s its perfectly fine to practice the ultimate form of birth control, to gouge visual organs, and to be a human ammunition depot. Unfortunately, this match lacked any weapons of mass destruction. That’s okay, both teams worked a good match and ended when Driver caught Pendleton with a Sunset flip on a blind tag. Later on the show, it would be revealed why these teams shook hands.
- The Anger Alliance appears on the WrestleVision Tron 7800. Adam Roberts instructs Kyle Matthews & Brandon Phoenix to study all groups of 4 throughout wrestling history. And then out of nowhere, Matthews struts not so like Ric Flair and goes WHOO! At this point, this might be the most awesome promo ever. Brody Ray Chase brags about racking in mad Lucci while allegedly talking on the phone to Sal Rinauro. He jabbers about Todd Sexton, who mysteriously appears in the ring. Well, a referee heads to the back to let the rudos know that one Todd Sexton is calling them out. Sexton calls out the Anger Alliance because Sal has no BALLS OF STEAL like the Human Tornado. They answer Sexton’s challenge promptly by beating the living poop out of him. Everyone took turns stiffing the nuts out of Sexton. It was a beatdown of epic proportions. Brody Ray gave him the stunner, Phoenix delivered his patented STO, Roberts with the spinning cutter and Matthews with the Clothesline from Butcher’s Hollow. Sexton knew that he was f**ked and picked the wrong night to pick on a group of 4 that lived up to its name. Sexton sold it like a million bucks. Driver, Walters, Pendleton and Konley ran out to make the save. Sexton won’t be optically challenged after taking that licking. By the way, John Johnson, I heard Richard Morton and Rick Steiner are available for the Varsity Club.
- Seth Delay interrupts Patrick Bentley backstage. Delay basically tells him that not only is Bentley out of Slim J’s league, but he can’t even hang with him. Bentley wants to strangle Delay, but he has a long fuse and shrugs it off. Delay will still be Bentley’s friend even after the love of his life snatches all of worldly possessions.
3. Slim J squashed Patrick Bentley to take a 2 – 1 lead in the best of series.
This match certainly didn’t boost Bentley’s confidence. In fact, Slim J outright humiliated the youngster by living up to every thing that Survivor’s theme says: outwit, outsmart and outlast. Slim provided a professional wrestling and mixed martial arts clinic by demonstrating his knowledge of triangle chokes, armbars, high flying aerodynamics, DDTs and fisherman floatovers, and arm scissors. Slim finally gets tired of Bentley and easily destroys him with the Roach clip to go up in their series 2 – 1. Slim just shakes his head at Bentley when grabs the mike. He called Bentley’s effort heartless and pathetic. Bentley tries to interject himself, but Slim laughs in his face and promises to whip his ass again, BUSTER~! Just like Lennox Lewis gave Oliver McCall back in 1998, all according to the gospel of John Johnson.
- No edition of Anarchy is complete with a confrontation between the NWA Elite and the Devil’s Rejects. Attorney/agent Jeff G Bailey was accompanied by Abomination, Jeff Lewis with his stogie and the newest edition, Phil Shatter. Bailey continued to brag about the chaos and destruction the Rejects met every time they face-off with the Rejects. Last week, “the Universal Soldier” Phil Shatter powerbombed Iceberg straight to Hades and became the first to ever pin him in Anarchy history. Iceberg was no longer a serial killer in the eyes of Bailey. He bragged about how Shatter survived IED’s, mortars and dead bodies riddled on the ground, yet he still managed to slay his enemies. And oh then there is the “Human Holocaust” Abomination, the man who single-handedly murdered Tank’s career. Last, but not least, Lewis had taken care of Tempers. Dan Wilson would be wise to never show face his again. This prompted Dan Wilson to rally his troops against the NWA Elite. Wilson accuses Bailey of working for FOX News with all the spin doctoring he’s putting on the story. He calls Shatter a “GI Jerkoff” and never defeated Iceberg or Tempers. Wilson had a fever and it wasn’t the flavor of a Pringle, it was for the blood of his own Rejects. Wilson was prepared to launch a full scale attack, but NWA Owner Jerry Palmer headed out to prevent World War III from occurring. Palmer threatens this feud better end at the Georgia Mountain Center in Gainesville, GA on the 23rd, when they will battle inside a 14 foot high steel cage in War Games. Wilson wants sacrificial lambs for the slaughter and noted the Elite are a man short. Bailey reminded that the Elite has unlimited resources and Rainman would fill in. Wilson screams as the Cornelia’s finest heads out to stop the carnage. Bailey calls Wilson a coward for calling the Po Po. As both factions prepare to battle, the cop that looked like he won the doughnut eating competition orders them to the back.
- NOTES: Chad Parham and Seth Delay had to pull out of the August 25 NWA Southern Pro show. However, Bryan Danielson is still set to wrestle Sean Denny on September 29 in Ahoskie, NC.
- DOWNLOAD: www.thesuperstation.net/nwaanarchy.html.